Category Archives: Baby

CarpeDiem or NOT to CarpeDiem? That is the question

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Ok so I have spent a lot of time in these last few weeks thinking about something. It’s constantly been spiraling around in my mind and it wasn’t until I read this article that I feel like it’s allowed to come to a stop.

In a nutshell, I’m afraid of getting through life too fast. I don’t want to be 80 and wish I would have done such-and-such or spent more time with so-and-so or enjoyed more moments of life. It becomes such a weight on me that I think it actually causes me to enjoy things less. In worrying about not savoring moments, I’m doing more worrying than savoring

So anyway, back to the article. She took the words right out of my mouth. I know I don’t have 3 kids and haven’t been a mom for a long time, but I can completely relate to what she is saying. If I had a nickel for every time I heard the following phrases, or other ones like it, I’d be rich.

“Enjoy every moment!”

“It goes by fast! Soak it In!”

“Aren’t these just the sweetest moments?”

“Don’t you just love being a mom?”

“Isn’t this just the best?”

It’s not that these moments aren’t sweet and wonderful, but they aren’t sweet and wonderful ALL of the time. And that’s just life, right? From what I’ve gathered, I don’t think you can FULLY appreciate something untill after it’s gone and behind you. 

I loved being in college when I was in college, but I look back on it with a fondness I couldn’t have conjured up while I was in it. I just don’t think any of us finish something and say, “Yep, I seized every moment of that and loved every second and cherished every minute.” Mostly, we say, “Well, I did my best, there were definitely some enjoyable moments, and I learned a lot.”

Most days the mom thing is great. It’s a privilege. It’s a joy. It’s indescribably sweet. Some days it’s hard. It’s dirty. It’s repetitive. It feels simple.

But like she said, there are those Kairos moments each day that make being a mom worth it … like making my little boy smile or holding his sweet little body in my arms or feeling his fingers wrap around mine. Those times are like little pieces of heaven.

It’s not just about the job of motherhood … it’s any job. It’s anything we do in life. We’re all human. We aren’t going to love every second of life while we’re in it. We can’t beat ourselves up for that and we need to cut ourselves some slack. What we can do is try to be content with where we are and aim to live with not an unrealistically positive outlook, but a grateful one.

–Ranisha S.

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HAPPY 8 MONTHS JAYCE !

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Happy 8th Month Birthday, Baby!

JAYCE,

unknowing yet wise,

miniature yet full of heart,

have done for me

what I have spent a lifetime

trying to do for myself.

 

You’ve lassoed time,

drawn it in,

and placed it in a bubble

of peace and contentment,

fixed in place

neither rolling back to the past

or forward to the future.

 

You have given me

the gift of the present,

where I’m now suspended

with you –

the past no longer

a prickly burr

holding me back,

and the future no longer

the momentum of my daily life.

 

Thanks to you,

the present

is all I need,

as long as I sit

in this bubble

with you.

 

She found strengh all in the eyes of a boy

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I made many resolutions before my son was born. Some were vague, if heartfelt: `I’ll take good care of you`; `I will keep you safe`. Others, specific: `I’ll breastfeed you for at least six months`; `I’ll never hit you`. It was a momentous turning point, the birth of a child, full of pain and emotion. It was a date to remember forever. And so, of course, it was a time for resolutions.

 

There seems to be some very basic primal need to mark significant dates by making resolutions. I’ve been welcoming the first day of this or the first day of that with a list of ways to better myself for as long as I can remember. Starting with the first day of the new semester, I will stop procrastinating. Starting with the first day of the new job, I will be organized. Starting on just about any landmark day you can think of ( like the Fourth of July, the day after Thanksgiving and new years), I will exercise regularly and eat a much healthier diet.

 

And yes, I have accumulated quite a pile of failed and repeated resolutions (I’ve been trying to stop procrastinating since high school, which means that I have now successfully put it off for years). But I keep making them, and I wouldn’t want to give up the practice. It suggests that change for the better really is possible and that today could be the first day of a new, improved me. . . Or maybe tomorrow.

 

But having a child was different. Becoming someone’s mother meant that my role in the world had changed — I wasn’t just the same old me trying to be a new, improved version. I was a mother, really and truly and forever, and the question was, what kind of person, what kind of mother, would be reflected in my child’s eyes?